Is your partner more passionate about hating Game of Thrones than having sex with you? Is the fact that he has ‘cinephile’ in his Twitter bio adversely affecting your libido? Has he not stopped talking about that one French film he saw at that film festival last year that ‘literally changed his perspective about the dynamics between men and women’?

If, for some reason, you still want to be with him, here’s a simple hack to snag his attention in the bedroom: Turn into an obscure Anurag Kashyap movie that nobody really gets…

Here’s how…

1) Call him a bhosadpapita – Men love it when you call them a bhosad, adding papita (papaya) into the mix makes it healthy and organic, which results in multiple orgasms.

2) Wear yellow boots in bed. After wearing them outside all day. The dirtier the boots, the dirtier (and greater) the sex.

3) Wear clothes worn by Nawazuddin Siddiqui in Raman Raghav 2.0 and get ready to unleash your inner sex goddess.

4) Start a No Smoking sub-reddit and belittle your man for not understanding the easter eggs and clues this movie had. Negging is fun. Men love it if you show love for ‘edgy’ movies that people ‘couldn’t comprehend’.

5) Insist on playing ‘Bandeh’ whenever you two are in bed, sing along loudly while he’s trying to get it on. That song is known for its sensuality.